Tuesday, 14 February 2012

L = love and asperger

L = Love

Valentine’s day is a ways of celebrating Love and showing to that special someone how much you actually care.  However for some people this can be very different.

Once of the common questions hovering about on the internet and asked in the literature is can an autistic person love? Or feel love?, or be loved? This is an interesting question / view especially as I have noted that it comes mainly from neuro-typical’s [or people without Asperger’s] but also there is a few Aspies asking the same question.  Why, mainly because one of the ain characteristics of Asperger syndrome is difficultly in social interaction and communication. These are also the main things required in order to gain and achieve relationships, both romantic and none romantic, such as friendships

However just because some may have these difficulties does not mean, and never will mean that they cannot LOVE.  They will love their parents / carer’s / guardians, they will probably love their pets and anything that is special to them and just like anyone else, we can love others and have relationships with other.

Just sometimes things go a tad slower pace and things can be seen by us as differently. I remember this time at university a man ‘flirting’ with me, with me no realising, spent the whole night wondering why my friends were laughing all night at me,  with myself getting quite upset as to why, not picking up at all on what this bloke was doing and just thinking he was an idiot.  In a previous post I’ve explored social situations and the fears and concerns that can arise in new situations as appose to learnt situations. In new situations, such as described above, it’s like there is a doubt as to what is expected, what to say and what you’re supposed to do.  Therefore these new situations that occur when meeting optional date can be very confusing and stressful.  However saying that noting is preventing  anyone from building relationships up and falling in love, things can just be seen slightly differently or take a little longer. 

Love in relation to As always reminds me of Elton john’s song “I want love” I think it sums up nicely how different people can experience love and the effect on them,

“But I want love, just a different kind I want love, won't break me down Won't brick me up, won't fence me in That's the love I want, I want love”

Veiw the rest of the Autsim Alphabet here:-  A-Z

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