Tuesday, 27 November 2012
help... i need somebody
Recently I admitted to myself that I need help. Now I don’t know exactly what sort of help I’m after. Not sure of what I want or what it’ll achieve, but help is something, that in this present day I fell I need. Desperately. Over the past few months, several things have happened and slowly they have all added together and I have let them get on top of me. By which I have constant mixed emotions and I don’t know where to turn, who to talk to and most of all how to get back onto the right path.
I haven’t had any official support in any form from medical perspective since I was 16, when I suddenly had to move from child to adult services and suddenly, the support group. The one to one lessons, the confidence building all came to a drastic halt. Was told they thought I was making progress and didn’t need as much and away I should go. Perhaps this was right? But perhaps, looking back it was wrong?.
I ended up struggling through six form and university without many friends and still with little social skills. Although the up rise and use of the internet has help enormously. Especially texting and emails however there are some things that I cant bring myself to do. And as a adult it is expected that I do them.
I am rubbish with money and finance, I have a great, I want therefore I’ll get attitude to money, luckily it has kinda worked out so far as I don’t seem to have expensive tastes, however I can see this getting tricky very quickly. For example I need to speak to the bank about rearranging a mortgage, however I cannot pick up the phone to do. I physically cannot ring them. sounds little but once I needed to urgently go to the hospital and I couldn’t ring 999… and that’s more where the problem arises.
So anyway. I’m pretty much left wondering where to turn and feeling very alone and abandoned in the world.
I need help… I need somebody… help… just any body…